Category: Let's talk
I wanted to start this topic because of the discussion about having gender-specific message boards. I admit I'm ignorant here, so cut me some slack. What do members of the same gender get together and talk about that they can't discuss with the other gender or in mixed company? I've just never made it a point to say, "Hey, I think it'd be fun if I went somewhere where there were no women. Wouldn't it be great?" I always thought I was a weirdo because I felt more comfy in a mixed crowd or around females. I just never had any issues where I thought only another guy could help me sort them out and never really thought guys were all that much more interesting to hang outwith than anyone else just as people. So what's so special about socializing exclusively with your own gender anyhow?
well .. there's the "men are from mars, women are from Venus" thing for one thing. Men and women can have very different ideas on relationships and things like that. you know, girls have this fantabulous photographic memory and always use it to get back at their guy. Girls are also said to be extreme bitches, while guys are more mellow you know, and they just live and think for the moment.
As discussed on the other board, women have periods and they sometimes like to talk to others who go through the same thing. .. I dunno .. about brands of protection, etc.
Guys have different physical experiences. you know? um, yeah .. I'll shut up now!
Even though I don't agree with the idea of having separate boards, I do admit there are times I want to talk to female friends and not have to listen to a guy's comments. I don't particularly want men around when discussing feminine hygiene issues, for example. Also, if I am upset about a relationship and in the mood to bash men, I don't want a man to speak up and defend other men. I just want to bash men until my hurt feelings ease up a little. So there are times when I would definitely prefer no men around. But otherwise, I prefer mixed groups.
Now, maybe I shouldn't be admitting this kind of stuff here, as people already have ideas about me, but to be honest, I've not foundanything I can't or won't discuss with either sex. I've had many female friends with which I've discussed pretty much everything, including women's hygene Becky, it doesn't bother me, and with people I care about, I can be sensative enough to discuss anything sensibly. I've always felt more comfortable around women, and on thewhole I easily have more female friends than male.
Generally when women talk to each other they just want to talk and men usually want to create answers. so sometimes when a woman is just wanting to talk and get things out she isn't exactly looking for a guy to say, well here's what you should do.
Us guys are like that, if some of our buds come up with an idea or a problem we want to be there to fix them. The other thing about this is usually Women are a bit more sensative than guys, unless your blackbird and most of us hadn't figured out what sex he is anyway!
Thing is when guys get in an arguement they can just say oh fuck you. You don't normally see women doing that to each other.
This is just beeing general so I don't want to hear well I'm not like that. not all of us fit in to one mold or another but most of the time we do.
rofl Shawn,
Shawn, you have a good point. Women do often just want to complain and bitch without some man saying "Here's what you should do."
And Kev, I know you and some other men don't mind hearing about feminine hygiene issues, and I have no doubt you can be sensitive, it's just one of my little issues. I prefer not to talk to men about certain things. It's nothing against men, it's just me.
I think Yogi is right on.
Sometimes, if I want to brag about my sexual prowess, my smelliest fart, or my favorite quarterback, I want a guy to talk about that stuff with.
I'm sure there are girls who could hold their own in such a conversation, but I wouldn't feel right talking about that kind of stuff with them (well, maybe the quarterback if I didn't have to explain everything).
In general, I enjoy conversations with everybody, but there are times...
Bob
Agree with becky.
But danielle, yu've shared some pretty disgustingly feminine stuff with me.
There are times when I just want a little girl talk. Not to say that I don't know guys who are just as up for those discussions as girls, but sometimes I just don't want to talk to guys. It's rare that it happens with me, as I really don't like girls much, but occasionally it does. On those rare occasions, we don't discuss anything monumental--just relationship-related things, and, as others have said, those feminine hygiene subjects which are so strange to discuss with guys.
You know it was only through some girls comfort of discussing such things that I learn you could get different sized tampons. something that had never occurred to me before.
I like to have knowledge then I'm comfortable when a strange situation arises. for example I'm more comfortable buying tampons or pads for a girl than I am buying condoms for myself. strange huh?
well I don't mind discussing any topic a girl brings up. And yes, that does include feminen hygene subjects and things.
I have no problem going to a store and buying condoms for myself, and I have the same kind of no problem going into a store and buying pads or tampons for my partner.
Menstruation is a fact of life. We all deficate, we all urinate, women menstruate. Ok sure it might be a little grose, but It's just as I said, a fact of life.
About the pads or tampons thing, if my gf doesn't tell me specificly what size or brand to buy, then I'm clueless, since obviously I don't use them myself.
If you can't be open with your partner about the smallest or personal things, you don't in my opinion, know them as well as you should. What if for some reason she's unable to get to a store and get them herself?
As for me buying condoms, it never bothers me if the store assistant thinks or knows I'm gonna get lucky. It could be worse, he or she doesn't necessarily know who it'll be with, or when, or even if. How do they know I'm not buying them for someone else?
And hey if all else fails and you worried about what the clerk might think, try thinking. "yeah? so I'm buying condoms! And your point is? If I'm getting some and you're not, then I'm 1 up on you aren't I!
There's my 2 cents, and I think I made some pretty agreeable statements. The only way I'd be uncomfortable buying condoms is if I needed like extra extra small ones. But luckily I don't have that problem. lol.
Cam
Hmmmm. This is an interesting topic.
Personally I like talking to guys about problems a little more than women because in my oppinion women seem to be very backstabbing. I'm not saying that guys aren't, but from my experiences it seems to live more in women. Just like guys seem to be the ones in my experiences that have cheated on women for dissatisfaction with sexual pleasures or something like that, women, are cunning, and deceiving liars sometimes, they plan their reasons to avenge IMO. But back to the subject, I think guys for me even though may not totally understand I kind of like hearing what he has to say about a relationship, especially if it is something about a man. Hearing it from a man about a man, from a man's point of view is the best way to hear it. I think the only thing I would probably talk to women and not men about, is like something to do with like weight loss or something, cuz guys seem to lie to us all the time and think we are not fat, when we really could need to lose a few pounds. But there's my two cents for the morning.
99% of you are fat, and your butt does look way to big in that dresss. I just thought I would clear that up.
Lol Sean
Oh yeah? Well your beer gut is nothing to brag about either. LOL
and neither is a guy who scratches his balls all day. Lol
hmm. note to self. stop...scratching...my...balls....all....day. there. much better!
I think a lot of this exclusivity that goes on between the two genders is a behavior that is both learned and impulsive.
I remember my teen years in high school, when hormones were bursting through my pores, the thoughts and feelings going through my mind were absolutely confusing. My awareness of the opposite sex was so acute that it seemed like any action I took, whether verbally or physically, was being carefully surveilled by each and every female pupil. The only time I felt like I could take a breather from the watchful eyes was when I got home or when I was with my buddies hanging out shooting some hoops.
But I remember watching other guys hanging out with some of the most beautiful girls, the mexican knock outs with guitar-shaped bodies, and they would act in a way that would make one think they were unaware of the beauty before them. These guys would fart, cuss, burp, spit greenish-yellow looggies, while Jennifer Lopez look-alikes were right before them, and insult these girls like they were just one of the guys.
I both hated them and envied them. I hated them because they treated cheapishly what I viewed as being very beautiful. I always wondered why they didn't see things my way, why they could just be so irreverent to a beautiful girl standing right before them. It seemed like a damned crime to me. But I envied them because of the ease with which they carried themselves in a situation I viewed as one requiring strict rules of conduct. What amazed me was that these girls didn't seem to mind being treated in this manner. I even used to think that these girls preferred such guys because all I ever saw was beautiful girls coupled with some of the most brutish guys.
I came to realize that both guys like me and guys who are, or who I think are, brutish have a lot to learn. I can admit that high school days is a time during which some members of both genders start off ignorant of each other's true colors; I know that back then I wasn't aware that girls can smell the way guys do if they don't shower, that girls can say some of the most disgusting things too, that girls farts can floor twenty people standing in a room, that girls masturbate with similar fantasies in mind. Basically, I was naive when it came to girls.
Yet I don't know if I am better off for having realized the delusion I was under, or if I would've been better off if I had never emerged from my naivety. It's true, though, that losing reverence for beauty is a part of growing up, that losing awareness of gender differences is a learning process for some, and that certain inhibitions eventually subside. In the end, though, one comes to terms with the true colors of the opposite sex. I know I've come to accept these qualities in my woman.
I think that opposite gender exclusion is a necessity of life that affords us a break from daily roles we assume, and that without partaking in this activity, we will lose the ability to appreciate what makes gender differences attractive. Only by doing this will the man nurture a healthy desire for the smoothness and softness of the breast, the music of the feminine voice, the scent of the long hair, and the much needed presence, support, and feelings of a loving and caring woman. Or look at it this way, if the man isn't desiring these things while out on a hunting trip with all his buddies, he runs the risk of doing the dirty with the animals of nature or with one of his buddies.
I believe the woman's presence is the man's home. I could be a long way from home, I could be in the filthiest of places, I could be in the most wonderful place, but in any given situation it wouldn't be the same without the presence of or the desiring for my woman. So maybe this is nature's safe guard against homosexuality, bestiality, or any other type of sexuality.
So Godzilla On Toast, I know that some of what I've said is supported by what only a sighted person can understand because it all has to do with "seeing" the beauty of the opposite sex, but I don't doubt you'll understand my thoughts.
not bad description there all playing aside. High school is where I think most of us start trying to figure out who we are. for some the first 5 years out is where you find yourself and for some much later on. Women generally do mature faster than guys that is why you see 32 year old guys with 27 year old women. wait that's me! lol.
oh and to bucky becky! I am 160 pounds of twisted steel and sex appeal.
I think!
LOL Shawn, if that's true, I envy Booboo.